Well, I've decided to change the name of my blog as of today. When I found out we would be unable to place baby boy in daycare and I would have to quit my job to care for him, I consoled myself with big dreams ala Martha. I daydreamed of fertile fields of organic herbs, fruits and veggies, a basement tricked out for homemade baby product production, sewing and crafts for sale, a storage room bursting with homegrown homemade baby food and juice and even a worm farm. Yes, I said it...a worm farm! I had grand ideas of taking a giant step to the side of the grid (not off of it but tippytoes on the edge at least) and becoming self sufficient and healthy. Unfortunately, life has bitch slapped me right back into reality! My days aren't spent with my little guy happily cooing away in a Baby Bjorn as I skip barefoot through my abundant garden picking our lunch and herbs for the evening bath. I don't slave over a hot food processor all day to make yummy organically grown all natural baby food for my little guy to eat. I don't spend the evening elbow deep in calendula I grew in my back yard making lotion to sell at the Farmer's Market on Saturday mornings. I have done none of this.
My days are spent waiting hand and foot on the world's my self important 6 month old:) There are days I don't shower until he goes to bed. Most days I don't eat until 2:00 in the afternoon. I can change a wet diaper upside down, in the dark with one hand tied behind my back without him even waking up. And you know what? I'm OK with that. I may not be changing THE world or making it a better place but I'm changing HIS world and making it a better place. So I'll just have to be content with my herb garden full of burnt up sprouts, my dinky garden plot with barely struggling plants and veggies, the basement remaining a rarely used Man Cave and buying organic baby food from the grocery store. For now, I am just excited that I have mastered the "putting baby to sleep while wide awake" skill set this past week. However, there is a new spring right around the corner and next year I'll be ready for it!
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